New In Cinemas Today

June 22, 2007

18676739.jpg

The Hitcher

La Vie En Rose (pictured)

Lucky You

New DVDs Out Today

June 18, 2007

good-shepherd-0.jpg

Scrubs: Season 5

Blood Diamond

The Good Shepherd

The Shield: Season 3

Shortbus

NEW In Cinemas Today

June 15, 2007

vacancy1.gif

Fantastic Four: Rise Of The Silver Surfer (header image) 

Exiled

Vacancy (pictured)

The War On Democracy

Grow Your Own

Opening Night

Tell No-one

The Wild Blue Yonder

Simpsons Trailer Treats

June 12, 2007

THE SIMPSONS MOVIE

RELEASE DATE: July 27th 

Two foreign versions of the same Simpsons Movie trailer for you to compare. In Spain they’re getting ready for a Pan’s Labyrinth-esque historic mystery, but those German folks seem to be looking forward to a slapstick police comedy that descends into a farcical re-make of It’s A Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World. You decide… 

Apocalypto

Hot Fuzz (pictured)

Goal! 2: Living The Dream

Monty Python’s Flying Circus: Complete Series 4

9th Company: Collector’s Edition

Sophie’s Choice: 25th Anniversary Edition

The first rule of Fight Club is: Do not dare criticise Fight Club.

Some films create such a skillful illusion of capturing the zeitgeist and/or raging against the machine that any shortcomings are easily forgiven for the sake of ‘artistic merit’. To explain this further, take the inexplicably interminable sitcom sewage that is ‘Two Pints Of Lager & A Packet Of Crisps’, a grossly misguided attempt to draw humour from the image of contemporary youth culture. And guess what? They got it right. Millions tuned in to ‘enjoy’ gags more predictable than Mother Teresa’s menstrual cycle, and it’s now been running for longer than Forrest Gump. Is it the sparkling intellectual dialogue? The ingeniously constructed plotlines? No, it’s because people are stupid. It’s something we’re far too PC to admit this side of the millenium, but the facts are inescapable- ‘Two Pints…’ is comedy BY the dumb, FOR the dumb. As a member of this alleged wild, fun-loving youth bracket, I for one refuse to be represented by the kind of lazy, uneducated sexist chavsters that populate this grotesque world- at least in comedy form anyway. Why not try playing ‘Insert your own drink/dole/genitalia-related punch-line before the end of the gag’ game next time you watch. I bet you’ll win. Sadly, however much I slander it, the monster will not go back to the swamp, or become any less popular with its unfathomable target audience.

 That said, we return to David Fincher’s ambitious 1999 adaptation of Chuck Palahniuk’s seemingly un-adaptable novel. A story hashed together from observations, conversations and themes that happened to occupy the minds of Chuck and his friends on a given day. Perhaps hindsight and 8 years of imitations and media history validates this argument more effectively than on its release, but the themes of unattainable lifestyle standards imposed by advertising and the ‘longing for fathers’ just scream pretentious, however smartly handled or visually enhanced they may be. And yes, there’s no denying that Fight Club is a masterpiece of filmmaking on aesthetic grounds- the set-pieces are works of logistical genius, the photography inspired (the Ikea pseudo-commercial and the office sequence are highlights in this respect)- but this only serves to guiltily wrap up the shameless moral force-feeding in shiny coloured paper. In the most simple terms, it takes itself far too seriously. It’s as much a work of provocative importance as Jade Goody is a celebrity. There’s no denying she is one, but no one is really able to explain why. Read the rest of this entry »

It took its name from Big Brother ditz-fest Chantelle’s reality show, and it’s just as stupid.

The first chapter in the football prodigy saga was at least watchable and actually quite touching, if not a masterpiece of contemporary cinema. You could root for the boy as he struggled to break out of humble beginnings and make it in the world of ‘soccer’, willing him to beat the critics and his scary dad to play the game he loves in England, praying he’ll finally get it on with Anna Friel and her dodgy geordie accent. Read the rest of this entry »

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
UK RELEASE DATE: July 12th

As the ‘political’ chapter in JK Rowling’s teenage wizard series reaches our screens, the recently announced Harry Potter theme park in the US should be well under way. However, the first doubts surfaced following the results of the MTV Movie Awards this week. The HUGELY COVETED PRIZE for ‘Best Film We Haven’t Seen Yet’ (no, really) was stolen from the clutches of the pubescent magician and co. by none other than Transformers. A film about a retro toy. That Michael Bay has directed. Oh well, wait ’til they actually see it.